Self Love
Helping shouldn’t hurt: Self care for care providers
“… if I say more, I would be insulting my father.” My friend’s voice trailed into silence. We stay hung in eternity. I understood what my sister would once in a while share with me amidst tears. She is the care provider for our father.
Care giving could be physical, financial, or both. More than anything you are the emotional support. They feel stronger because you are there. They feel wanted, cared for and sometimes, loved.
The toughest job description is when you sign up to be a care provider for a parent. Parents love to run the show. When the roles reverse, it could turn unpleasant. If the child has other responsibilities it gets worse. The saddest scene is when you have to always respond to “how is your ____ doing?” We forget to ask “How are you feeling? Is there anything I can do for you?”
In the beginning you are happy that people care about your responsibility. As this continues your job assignment bears its toll on your subconscious.The one you care for makes demands of you as an infant would. You unconsciously begin resenting your role. You seek escapes yet morally feel obliged. You feel trapped.
Remember when you are running on empty you cannot fill anyone’s cup. Self-care is of utmost importance for care-providers.
Here’s a list of what self-care isn’t:
Throwing money and pretending things will get better
Here is a shortened list of effective self-care:
Do one thing that makes you happy for 1-15 minutes every day. Take care of you, so you can be better at your role as a care provider.
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